Are We Being Disconnected by Social Media?
The final shot of The Piano Teacher, where Erika exits the splendid concert hall representative of the Viennese musical culture and bourgeoisie, conveys an intriguing message that could potentially shed light on a prevailing issue in modern society. Throughout Erika’s life, she strives for an unyielding facade of perfection and invulnerability, which corresponds with the grand edifice she ultimately escapes from.
By reason of her assiduous pursuit of this outer image and lifestyle, she takes on what Gilson refers to as a “reductively negative view” of vulnerability. From Erika’s perspective, being vulnerable amounts to weakness, powerlessness, and loss of
control. As a result of her denial of vulnerability, she fails to establish intertwining connections with other people, and suffers severely from interpersonal detachment.
In the present days, we seem to be confronting a similar predicament of detached interpersonal relationships, under the ubiquitous influence of social media.
In my view, social media allows its users to construct a highly-polished facade of their life. Such phenomenon is particularly prevalent among the millennials and their younger counterparts, who generally spend a considerable amount of time on social media platforms, including Facebook and Instagram, among others, and are prone to be heavily influenced by the comments, evaluations, and feedback they receive from their peers. Thanks to these platforms and the advance of mobile technology, we have speedy access to almost everyone’s aspects of life. However, whereas social media ostensibly enables us to connect to anyone, it gives rise to a great deal of detrimental issues, such as interpersonal detachment, social isolation, depression, and loneliness.
In a study that explores relationships among Facebook use, envy, and
depression, several researchers conduct an online survey of 736 college students in the United States. Their findings indicate a link between Facebook use and feelings of envy, which is subsequently linked to symptoms associated with depression:
College students who use Facebook heavily have higher levels of envy because they are exposed to a lot of personal information from users in their networks. Since users of SNS strive for a positive self-presentation […], Facebook users are exposed to successes, material goods, positive relationships, and other information that other users share on Facebook.
Exposure to these pieces of positive information about others can lead to feelings of envy, as information consumers can feel subordinated to others who seem to publish positive experiences all the time. The irony, of course, is that users rarely post negative experiences, which might contradict the
aim of positive self-presentation. Thus, when users feel envious constantly, they might develop depression symptoms over time. (Tandoc et al. 144) The result of the survey indicates that the feelings of envy triggered by social media platforms serve as a reason for the depression symptoms among college students, who feel inferior to their peers after seeing others’ positive self-representations online. In a similar vein, Dennis Thompson maintains that a majority of millennials suffer from depression on account of their heavy addiction to social media, as well as comparing themselves to those who appear better off than them on social media (Thompson).
Many who post to Facebook or Instagram take pains to portray themselves in a flattering light, and therefore produce feelings of inferiority in those who make comparisons based on this inflated image (Thompson). In other words, while social media allows us to share the great things in life, it also serves as a virtual arena where many compete to exhibit glamor, luxury, wealth, and power. The viewers do not know to what extent a post or a picture is embroidered by its owner, yet they could be tremendously affected by it, and urged into making unwholesome judgments and comparisons about their own ways of living. As a result, more and more people become obsessed with glamorizing reality on social media, in order to fabricate a virtual image of perfection and invulnerability. What is publicized is not life itself, but the fragments of it that are carefully selected, delicately embellished, and easily perceived by their viewers as the truth. Subsequently, as this habitually cultivated act of empowerment becomes increasingly popularized among social media users, people growingly become detached not only from reality, but also from one another
emotionally and interpersonally. Illusory perceptions of what one absorbs from social media not only result in delusional connections and gaps in communication, but also jealously, adulation, and ostracization, in substitution for genuine, real-world social interactions. By and large, while social media is initially devised to facilitate easy and
instant connections, the way it detaches its users on an emotional and interpersonal level has evolved into a critical concern, mostly confronted by young adults and adolescents struggling with social media addiction.
In view of the growing alienation in interpersonal relationships caused by improper use of social media, I propose that we are living in a time that requires healing. While many social media users tend to strive for an invulnerable image on social media, which is essentially illusory, it becomes all the more crucial that we contemplate what truly gives rise to authentic and restorative relationships. I call for the urgency to scrutinize how virtual reality on social media has affected our real-life relationships with others, as well as how much we are aware of the distinction
between reality and the idealized facades projected into social media. Given that social media enables us to conceal the demerits and publicize solely the enviable, the idea of inventing a perfect life and an invulnerable identity can be alluring. However, as indicated by the case of Erika in The Piano Teacher, who quests for perfection and invulnerability on every level of her life, such impractical aspirations are not only illusory, but could result in the individual’s severely detached relation to the surroundings.
This is indeed a time for us to be vulnerable again, which is the only way for us to form genuine, healing connections with one another. However, being vulnerable does not entail self-victimization on social media, which – considering the
manipulative motive behind victim-playing – is in fact a distorted form of oppression.
In order to heal through vulnerability, we must reevaluate how our relationships with others have been affected by our daily use of social media. Differently put, we should take a step back from the growing obsession with an impeccable, curated self-image on social media, and restore our focus to cultivating real-life interactions, where we are willing to open up to and support one another. Given that we are living in an era
of information explosion where social media is around us in different capacities, complete abstinence from social media has become almost impossible. Yet we are also living in a time where detached interpersonal relationships are growing into a profound issue, especially among millennials and the younger generation, who are entrapped in the unbreakable bond with social media. Accordingly, what we should endeavor to undertake is not a downright repudiation of social media, but the reinstatement of real-life, face-to-face interactions, where we can abstain from the ideal of invulnerability in the formation of healing connections with one another.
Conclusion
Through this thesis, I have attempted to elaborate on two main focuses. First, I seek to de-demonize psychopaths and demonstrate how they are generally caricatured into malicious and invulnerable individuals, particularly through the villainous
portrayal in cinema, which strives to make these characters highly memorable.
Following Erinn C. Gilson’s conception of vulnerability as a fundamental and unavoidable dimension of human existence, I explore the vulnerable side of psychopaths, proposing that psychopaths are also vulnerable human beings despite the differences in the way their mind and emotions may operate from most empathic individuals. Differently put, I work towards an understanding of psychopaths that restores them from monstrous evil-doers to intrinsically vulnerable human beings.
My second focus is to illustrate how vulnerability is crucial to one’s inner healing, considering that vulnerability is the link that connects individuals through opening them to alteration and affection in ways one cannot predict or control. I argue that it is through intersubjective connections that one gets to heal. In other words, to repudiate vulnerability – that is, to seek invulnerability – is to sever the connection, obstruct the openness, and impede the healing process. In order to specifically
exemplify my argument, I explore Michael Haneke’s 2001 film The Piano Teacher. I argue that the film can be regarded as an interpretation of psychopathy distinct from that in most other films, on account of its specific emphasis on the vulnerable aspect of the psychopathic protagonist Erika Kohut. In the film, Erika is situated within the dynamics between vulnerability and invulnerability, where she concretizes Gilson’s conception of the ambiguous/ambivalent dimension of vulnerability. While Erika’s psychopathic features denote her pursuit of invulnerability, the film concurrently delineates her inevitable existence as a vulnerable human being. Moreover, I also explore how Erika’s habitual pursuit of invulnerability impacts her perception of love,
which is predicated on the formation of interpersonal connections through
vulnerability. In this way, I maintain that regardless of psychopaths’ emotional and behavioral dysfunctions, it would be inaccurate to assert that they are entirely incapable of love and being affected.
Additionally, whereas the film’s ambiguous ending is often construed as Erika’s self-destruction, I propound a different interpretation of the ending that suggests the prospect of the heroine’s healing, initiated by her ultimate acceptance of her inherent vulnerability, which is the key to forming connections with others. In other words, I contend that the film’s ending implies, both visually and narratively, different layers of openness, which is the defining attribute of vulnerability and
consequently gives potential for a healing prospect for the heroine, in which she could transform the detached self into an interconnected self.
Last but not least, extending from the notion of healing through vulnerability in The Piano Teacher, I propose that we are currently living in a time in need of such
healing, in consideration of the increasingly detached interpersonal relationships induced by social media. Whereas social media facilitates sharing thoughts and ideas, it gives rise to an upward trend in detached real-life relationships, concomitant with a growing fascination with the invention of a flawless, invulnerable persona on social media. The phenomenon is particularly noticeable among millennials and the younger generation, who rely heavily on using social media platforms. As they become more inclined to maintain an invulnerable virtual identity, they are less willing to be vulnerable to one another in real-life relationships. In this regard, I propose that the improper use of social media exemplifies detachment as the corollary of repudiating vulnerability and seeking its inverse. As a consequence, given that we are living in a time where invulnerability is frequently endorsed as the standard for success and empowerment, healing through vulnerability should be regarded as a crucial matter to
contemplate and habitually exercise. At the end of the day, it is through vulnerability that we heal in the formation of interpersonal connections, where love and sustaining relations occur and affect us, in ways that embrace unpredictable potentials and creative transformations.
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