3.3.1 The idea of shenxian
Before the discussion on Joly’s, Hawkes’ and the Yangs’ translations of the idea of shenxian (神仙), it is worth investigating and elaborating on various
definitions of this complicated idea of shenxian. The Chinese word shenxian is highly related to Taoism and is initially referred to as an enlightened and unusual person. In fact, sometimes scholars separate shenxian as two words shen (神) and xian (仙) to define and describe what they are. The meaning of the word shen is less complicated, which is often understood as gods or deity. The concept of xian, however, is much more complex and intricate.
Xian can be humans or immortals. Xian can be used to describe the immortals dwelling apart from the world or as exceptional figures. In addition, Victor H. Mair (1994) described the archetype of xian as “[those who] dwell apart from the chaotic world of man, subsist on air and dew, and are not anxious like ordinary people” (p.
376). Furthermore, he interpreted the word xian as “the transcendents” (Mair, 1994, p.
376). With these different interpretations of the word xian, it is definitely a
challenging work for any translator who attempts to deal with the problem. In fact, before working on translating Hong Lou Meng, Hawkes had translated the concept of xian in three poems, which are translated as the “Far-off Journey” (yuan you 遠遊), the “Sorrow for Troth Betrayed” (xi shi 惜誓), and the “Alas That My Lot Was Not Cast” (ai shi ming 哀時命), in his translation of the Chuci.
The “Far-off Journey” poem, written by Qu Yuan (屈原), describes the poet’s indignation for the hostility and ill-treatment he got from the court and the poet’s imagination of a spiritual journey into the realms of “immortals” to get away from the
chaotic world. In the poem, the poet accounts his hope to get away from the turmoil he had gone through:
The Chinese original:
貴真人之休德兮，
美往世之登仙。（屈原，2005，頁 130）
Hawkes’ translation:
I honoured the wondrous powers of the Pure Ones,
And those of past ages who had become Immortals. (Hawkes, 1985, p. 194)
In addition, the theme of the “Sorrow for Troth Betrayed” poem resembles that of the “Far-off Journey” poem. However, the poet of the “Sorrow for Troth Betrayed”
poem, which remains unknown, expresses his hope to go home instead of becoming a xian:
The Chinese original:
念我長生而久仙兮，
不如反于之故鄉。（”惜誓”，2005，頁 254）
Hawkes’ translation:
But then I thought that this immortal life of the blessed,
Was not worth the sacrifice of my home-returning. (Hawkes, 1985, 240)
With numerous possible definitions and interpretations of xian, Hawkes had an alternative. In the “Alas That My Lot Was Not Cast” poem, instead of using
“Immortals” and “immortal” to translate the idea of xian, Hawkes (1985) translated xian zhe (仙者) as “holy hermits” (p. 266). Thee three examples of Hawkes’
translations of xian or xian zhe suggest that Hawkes was well aware of the various definitions of xian.
In Joly’s translation, shenxian is rendered as “spiritual life,” which bears no particular religious touch. As for the Yangs, they translated the concept of shenxian as
“immortals.” Compared with Joly’s and the Yangs’ translations, Hawkes’ translation of shenxian as “salvation” is more noticeable. In the study of theology, the term salvation is referred to as “deliverance from sin and its consequences, believed by Christians to be brought about by faith in Christ” (“Salvation,” n.d.). Therefore, the use of the concept of salvation makes the song filled with a touch of Christianity in Hawkes’ translation of the song.
In fact, apart from his translation of the idea of shenxian, Hawkes tends to replace Buddhist and Taoist ideas with Christian phrases during translation. For instance, according to Feng Qinghua (馮慶華，2008), in terms of Hawkes’ translation of the Buddhist phrase e mi tuo fo (阿彌陀佛), Hawkes tends to use the strategy of domestication to translate the phrase. Of all the forty places mentioning e mi tuo fo, there are thirty four translations rendered in domestication such as “Holy Name” or
“Blessed name of the Lord” (馮慶華，2008，頁 136).
In terms of the three translations of shenxian in the first line of the song,
Hawkes is the only translator choosing to use the idea of salvation to interpret the idea of shenxian. Considering his three translations in the Chuci, it is impossible to say that Hawkes did not quite understand the concept of shenxian. However, if we look
further on the background of his translation of the Chuci, The Songs of the South, and of The Story of the Stone, there might be some explanations for his choice.
In the 1950s, Hawkes studied the complex problems of authorship of the Chuci for his Oxford D. Phil. dissertation. In 1956, he completed his doctoral
dissertation, which contains a complete translation of the Chuci. His translation of the Chuci, titled as The Songs of the South, was published by Oxford University Press in 1959. Later on, the translator himself made few changes to the translation and the work was re-published by the Penguin Classics in 1985. The history of the publication of The Songs of the South seems to suggest that Hawkes’ role in translating the Chuci is more like a scholar for the purpose of academic considerations. Unlike the
translation of the Chuci, however, when translating Hong Lou Meng Hawkes had more freedom to decide how to present the original to the English readers. In the 1998 interview Hawkes explained his own considerations on translating Hong Lou Meng and the differences between translating Chuci and Hong Lou Meng:
I’d thought that what I’d like to do is a translation where I don’t have to think about academic considerations. Scholarly considerations. I’ll just think about how to present – this is Penguins, after all – how to present this book in such a way that I do the whole of it but at the same time it’s enjoyable for the English reader, if possible, and they can get some of the pleasure out of it that I got myself. So it’s in a different sort of – the way that I went about that, my attitude to it, was very very different from when I was doing Chuci. (as cited in Fan, 2012, p. 148)
From the interview above we can see that Hawkes’ target readers are the
common English readers, which might be the reason for using the idea of salvation to
maximize the communication with most English readers.
3.3.2 The idea of gongming
Another example of reducing the Chineseness of the text is Hawkes’ translation of the concept of gongming (功名) and jiangxiang (將相). The term gongming has two different layers of meanings in old Chinese culture. It is broadly referred to as fame or reputation. The second layer, however, is strictly related to the system of the imperial examination ke ju (科舉) in old China, the phrase being the imperial
examination or the official posts through success in the examination. Though different dynasties may have different categorization of the system, the imperial system generally contains the civil examinations wen shi (文試) and the military examinations wu shi (武試). Those who passed the civil examinations would be designated as civil officials xiang (相), while the successful candidates of the military examinations would be appointed to military posts jiang (將) (“Imperial examination,” n.d.).
In addition, one can also attain gongming with his outstanding military service during wars. In chapter 7 of Hong Lou Meng, the old servant Jiao Da (焦大) shouted at the young master Jia Rong (賈蓉), claiming his late old master’s and his great contribution to the ranks and titles the Jia family enjoy and talking about the hardships the old master had gone through during wars. In addition, in Chapter Five of the Chinese original the ancestors of the Jia family account the doomed fate of the Jia family:
The Chinese original:
吾家自國朝定鼎以來，功名奕世，富貴流傳，已歷百年，奈運終數盡，不 可挽回。（曹雪芹，2003，頁 54）
Hawkes’ translation:
[‘]In the hundred years since the foundation of the present dynasty,[’] they said, [‘]several generations of our house have distinguished themselves by their services to the Throne and have covered themselves with riches and honours; but now its stock of good fortune has run out, and nothing can be done to replenish it[.] (Hawkes, 1973/1988, p. 137)
From the translation above we can see that the word gongming is also closely related to one’s performance in battlefields. Regarding the song in Chinese original, the text indicates that all men are in pursuit of fame, reputation or rank to become great civil officials, politicians or the generals and are unaware of the doom of the vanished splendor. In Joly’s translation of the concept of gongming and jiangxiang, he rendered gongming as “fame” and jiangxiang as “the statesmen.” Joly’s use of
“the statesmen” clearly indicate readers that idea of gongming is related to one’s success in the field of politics. In addition, though the Yangs’ “the great ones of old”
barely reflects the connection between the idea of jiangxiang and politics, their use of “riches and rank” somehow reminds readers of the images of the rich and politicians with military honours. Compared with Joly’s and the Yangs’ renditions, Hawkes’ “ambition” and “the famous ones of days gone by” seem to suggest that the famous ones of days gone by are those with ambition and fame in history.
3.3.3 The idea of xiao shun
In addition, xiao shun (孝順) is also a cultural-specific word. According to
Alan K. L. Chan and Sor-hoon Tan (2004), “孝” or “孝順” is commonly rendered as
“filial piety.” The following is the definition of the concept of “孝” by Encyclopaedia Britannica:
“filial piety,” in Confucianism, the attitude of obedience, devotion, and care toward one’s parents and elder family members that is the basis of individual moral conduct and social harmony. Xiao [孝] consists in putting the needs of parents and family elders over self, spouse, and children, deferring to parents’
judgement, and observing toward them the prescribed behavioral proprieties.
(“Xiao,” n.d.)
Xiao shun, as the core of Confucianism, has a long history and deep foundation in Chinese culture. There is, however, no corresponding concept of xiao shun with that of ancient China in the West. In fact, according to Xinrui Yuan and Qing Wang (2011), there is filial idea in Western history, but Chinese filial piety culture is quite different from Western filial piety culture.
They stated that “filial piety [of Chinese culture] is limited to consanguinity. In contrast, Western filial piety has not yet well developed with the passage of time;
consequently, the content is limited. The Western culture leans to surpass the nature, and is affected by Christianity, so its idea of filial piety is not limited to consanguinity but God-based” (Yuan & Wang, 2011, p. 105). While the idea of Western filial piety is so different from that of Chinese filial piety, the use of “filial” in translations might be unfamiliar and a bit Christian for most English readers.
Therefore, it is not surprising that in both Joly’s The Dream of the Red Chamber and the Yangs’ A Dream of Red Mansions these translators all use the word “filial” to
interpret the phrase xiao shun in the last of the song. Hawkes, however, did not choose to use the more commonly rendered “filial” or “filial piety” to denote the idea of xiao shun. Hawkes’ translation, as “grateful children,” may seem to weaken the Chineseness of the song, but the idea of xiao is more comprehensible for readers who don’t have a background in Chinese culture.
Chapter Four “Hao liao ge zhu”
Realizing that the “Hao liao ge” is served as a mockery of the laity’s weaknesses regardless of place or time, Zhen smiles at the Taoist and provides the song with a commentary. The commentary, often referred to as “Hao liao ge zhu” by scholars of the novel, not only corresponds to the ideas of “Hao liao ge” but also further elaborates on the future developments of the characters and of the four wealthy families in the work.
The literal meaning of the word zhu is “annotation” or “commentary.” According to the commentaries in red ink in the 1754 version of the Chinese manuscript, the novel begins the opening chapter with these two verses to explicitly remind the readers of the impermanence of the wild world and of the irreversible doom of the vanished splendor.
Below is the Chinese original of the commentary done by Zhen:
The Chinese original:
陋室空空，
當年笏滿床。
衰草枯楊，
昔為歌舞場。
蛛絲兒結滿雕梁，
綠紗今又糊在蓬窗上。
說什麼脂正濃、粉正香，
如何兩鬢又成霜？
昨日黃土隴頭送白骨，
今宵紅绡帳底臥鴛鴦。
金滿箱、銀滿箱，
Joly’s translation Hawkes’ translation The Yangs’ translation
Sordid rooms and
Parched grass and
Even as you speak, the raven locks turn white.
While yet the rouge is fresh, the powder fragrant,
The hair at the temples turn hoary—for what cause?
Yesterday, yellow clay received white bones;
Today, red lanterns light the love-birds’ nest;
While men with gold and silver by the chest
Turn beggars, scorned by all the dispossessed.
While you deplore that
One at some other’s short life gives a sigh,
Not knowing that he, too, goes home – to die!
The judge whose hat is too small for his head
Wears, in the end, a convict’s cangue instead.
Who shivering once in rags bemoaned his fate,
Today finds fault with scarlet robes of state.
A life cut short one moment makes one sight,
Who would have known it’s her turn next to die?
No matter with what pains he schools his sons.
Who knows if they will turn to brigandry?
A pampered girl brought up in luxury
May slip into a quarter of ill fame;
Resentment at a low official rank
May lead to fetters and a felon’s shame.
In ragged coat one shivered yesterday,
Today a purple robe he frowns upon;
Confusion reigns far
Each of us with that poor girl may compare
Who sews a wedding-gown for another bride to wear.
All’s strife and tumult on the stage,
As one man ends his song the next comes on.
To take strange parts as home
Is folly past compare; Chinese original, and Hawkes eloquently rendered the commentary into sonnet of the form of heroic couplets. As for the Yangs, they translated the song line by line and made the song into a rhymed one. The commentary, however, becomes in Joly’s hands a piece of somewhat stilted and long prose. Joly’s rendition of Hong Lou Meng is known as “an extremely literal translation” (Minford, 2010), and the extreme literalness is reflected in the word orders, number of words and parts of speech in his translation