Chapter 2 gives an overview and a summary of relevant literature on TCKs, who they are, what makes them different from their peers, the effect that the mobile and multicultural lifestyle has on them, including benefits and challenges as a result of this lifestyle, common characteristics that TCKs, career theories, adaptability, and Kolb’s experiential learning model.
Third Culture Kid (TCK)
The Making of TCKs
In today’s world, not only is it common for people of all ages to travel to different countries and regions, but a growing number of people are living in multiple nations for extended periods of time starting early in their childhood years. The reasons for these opportunities to live abroad may include business expatriation, military, missionary work, work in foreign services, technical aid work, humanitarian and development aid, work in media, and work in education (Cameron, 2006; Jandt, 2007; Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
These intercultural experiences change individuals in their worldviews, values, attitudes, abilities, and other fundamental ways. They are not true members of their host culture(s) and they are no longer the same person they were before their exposure to new culture(s) outside that of their original country. They have developed a “third cultureness” (Pollock 1998).
The term Third Culture Kid (TCK) was first coined in the 1950’s by anthropologist and sociologist Ruth Useem (Espinetti, 2011; Pollock 1998). Ruth Useem and her husband John Useem worked with families of U.S. business and government who were on overseas assignments. She observed the children in these families and noted their uniqueness; observing different thinking patterns and different points of references for these children (Pollock, 1998).
TCKs, a product of cultural exchanges, have always been around (Gillies, 1998;
Pollock & Van Reken, 2009). According to Pollock and Van Reken (2009), they are increasing in visibility now for various reasons. Where they were perhaps once
8
considered anomalies, they have now become a rapidly growing group of individuals. As these TCKs grow up, they give voice to their experiences by forming groups, sharing their experiences on various platforms such as blogs, and websites, forming more awareness in the general public. Public figures who are TCKs have also brought more attention to this group of individuals. Finally, the significance of the TCK experience has increased in today’s world. “Looking at the TCK world can help us prepare for the long-term consequences of this new pattern of global cultural mixing.” (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009, p. 5)
TCKs Defined
Pollock defines a TCK as someone who has spent a significant amount of time during his developmental years in a culture outside that of his parents. This results in the individual incorporating elements from the host culture(s) and the “home” culture to create a third culture (Pollock, 1998). Pollock goes on to say that rather than finding a sense of belonging in a place, their sense of belonging lies within relationships to others of similar background. He felt inclined to qualify some of the key words within his definition. As each person has different personalities, life experiences, perceptions, attitudes, temperaments, and other characteristics, individuals will respond differently even to similar experiences. Therefore, the amount of time needed in a host culture before third-culture characteristics are developed varies for each person (Pollock, 1998;
Selmer & Lam, 2004). Other variables to consider when examining a TCK life include:
disposition, age of entry into the mission context [host culture], amount of time spent as an MK [Missionary Kid], health of family dynamics, sibling separation, degree of social restriction experienced, amount of contact with other expatriates, frequency of visits back to the passport country, access to internet and electronic mail. (Cameron, 2006, p.150)
Finally, the development of a TCK is what distinguishes the experience of a TCK most from that of his or her parents. The experience of living in a mobile and culturally mixed world impacts a person in a profoundly different way depending on whether it occurs during one’s developmental years or if it occurs in one’s mature adulthood (Pollock, 1998).
9
Even though each sub-group of TCKs (ie. children of business expatriates, missionary families, military families, and diplomatic families, etc.) has its own distinct characteristics, there are two definitive features at the core of all TCK experiences; TCKs are raised in a cross-cultural and a highly mobile world (Walters & Auton-Cuff, 2009;
Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
Two Sides of the Same Coin: Paradoxes of the TCK Lifestyle
TCKs have the opportunity to reap tremendous benefits from their lifestyle.
Through their experiences, the particular skills that they have the chance to acquire include cross-cultural, observational, social and linguistic skills. TCKs tend to be more open-minded, socially adaptable, intellectually flexible, resourceful, and are able to reconcile different view points (Cameron, 2006; Dewaele & Oudenhoven, 2009; Pollock
& Van Reken, 2009; Yoshida et al., 2009). Yet at the same time, the same lifestyle that allows them to enjoy these benefits also present many challenges. The paradoxical and conflicting nature of the TCK life can be observed in many of the issues that they deal with.
Broad worldview vs. torn allegiance.
TCKs may have a broader worldview, where they have the opportunity to live what others only watch on TV, or read in magazines and books (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
Sometimes though, the breadth in experiences of multiple cultures comes at the expense of depth in knowledge of a singular culture. While they may be knowledgeable about several other cultures, they may sometimes be insufficiently informed about their own to be competent in their home culture after their return (Cameron, 2006; Pollock & Van Reken, 2009). While they have the opportunities to learn many languages, they may not be fluent in their mother tongue. Due to their broad experiences and the many places they have lived in and connected with, TCKs are often open-minded and can often quickly relate to different people by finding common grounds (Byttner, 2012). The downside of this is that TCKs may feel a sense of confused loyalties and torn allegiance (Pollock &
Van Reken, 2009; Hoersting & Jenkins, 2011). An example of this internal struggle may be observed outwardly in how TCKs often become representative of all the cultures that they have spent time in and find themselves often jumping in to defend different cultures when other people criticize or attack that culture. They may defend their home culture or
10
host cultures with equal enthusiasm, depending on who is criticizing and which culture is being criticized (Byttner, 2012).
Appearance of cultural adaptability vs. lack of true cultural balance.
Outwardly, many TCKs seem to have high sensitivity to their surroundings and are able to blend in well by adopting culturally sensitive and appropriate behaviors. However, inwardly, they can lack true cultural balance, defined as an “almost unconscious knowledge of how things are and work in a particular community” (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009, p.44). The reason that they may not have true cultural balance is because the nuances of culture are learned through immersion and experience. The level of knowledge and familiarity in a culture is proportional to how much time one actually spends immersed in a culture because culture cannot be learned by studying books (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009). While they are able to pick up the outward elements of a culture such as language, appearance, and behavior through their TCK experiences, the subtleties of a culture and a community are not as easily and quickly learned.
Relationships.
In TCK literature, it has been said that TCKs usually define their sense of belonging in terms of relationships rather than a place (Fail et al., 2004; Pollock & Van Reken, 2009;
Walters & Auton-Cuff, 2009). Pollock & Van Reken (2009) note that because of this, TCKs often will make greater efforts than non-TCKs in trying to maintain their relationships, especially those within the TCK community. On the other hand, because the TCK experience is often riddled with goodbyes, TCKs may be prone to develop protective instincts against the pain of separation by avoiding true intimacy in relationships. As high mobility is a fact of life for many TCKs, they know that a friendship is normally just for a short season in life. Often, TCKs are found to bypass the more superficial levels of communication and start straightaway on a deeper level for their relationships (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009). However, even though they may start off at a deeper level of communication, they are often unwilling to move into deeper intimacy. Often, there is also little time for them to develop the relationship any deeper even if they had wanted to. Thus, they lack the practice to do so and this may affect their relationship patterns later on in life. Pollock and Van Reken (2009) speak of the possibility that emotional coldness and distance can become a protective mechanism that
11
is extended to many areas of life. They have noted that, “Sometimes what is praised as confidence and independence among TCKs may actually be a form of detachment”
(Pollock and Van Reken, 2009, p. 139)
Due to the number of people that they encounter in their TCK years, they often have many friends. Unfortunately, the sheer number of friendships can grow so large that it becomes unmanageable, not to mention the difficulties in maintaining relationships that are often geographically apart. TCKs may enjoy friendship from around the world, but they also have to deal with the pain and loss of having constantly interrupted relationships (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009; Smith, 2011). For many TCKs, one of the few constants in their TCK lifestyle is their family (Byttner, 2012), thus TCKs are often very close to their families.
Other Common TCK Characteristics
Education.
TCKs often have highly educated parents and are often sent to study in good schools abroad. In a study examining the educational and career choices of 400 TCKs, nearly 90% have college degrees, and over 40% have completed a graduate degree, while many others within the study are close to obtaining a graduate degree (Cottrell & Useem, 1999).
They also gain a rich education simply by living and experiencing life in different cultures (Byttner, 2012).
Delayed adolescence.
TCK literature speaks of an observed phenomenon called “delayed adolescence”
which describes how TCKs are so often so busy trying to figure out the outside world every time they are in a new environment that they do not have enough time to explore within themselves to figure themselves out in the time that their peers get to do so. So, it sometimes may take TCKs a little bit longer to discover who they are, what they are good at, and what their passions are. They may settle down later in life in all areas, including marriage, career, and lifestyle. (Cottrell & Useem, 1999; Pollock & Van Reken, 2009)
12 Perseverance and decisiveness.
In terms of endurance through hardship and finding solutions when encountering problems, Pollock & Van Reken (2009) noted that TCKs are sometimes underdeveloped in their problem-solving skills for long-term issues since their highly-mobile lifestyle often meant long-term problems sometimes disappear on their own when it comes time to move. This meant that sometimes TCKs would consider simply packing up and leaving a situation that they find difficult or challenging rather than confronting the situation and finding ways to deal with long-term problems (Smith, 2011). On a related issue, the unpredictable and transitory nature of the TCK lifestyle prompts many TCKs to seize opportunities when they arise and so they may seem very decisive, albeit impulsive to some. At the same time, the same elements of uncertainty and a sense of having no choice in deciding where they will be and what they will do sometimes make it difficult for TCKs to make decisions and plan ahead for the future, so they may just allow life to happen (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
Other Elements of the TCK Experience.
Other elements of the TCK experience may include living with obvious physical distinctions from the locals in host cultures, expectations of eventual repatriation to their home country, privileged lifestyles, and having a system identity, such as being a member of the religious community (missionary kids), being a part of the military community (military brats), or having membership in the expatriate community, in which they take up what Useem calls “representational roles” (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
TCKs and the Issue of Identity
At heart, TCKs often struggle with a sense of rootlessness and restlessness. The constant changing of environments in their developmental stages of life makes it difficult for some TCKs to establish an enduring sense of identity and belonging. They have trouble pinpointing where home is, and they develop a “migratory instinct” that urges them to be constantly on the move (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009, pp. 123-127).
Establishing a sense of identity and a sense of belonging are the greatest challenges for the average TCK (Isogai, Hayashi & Uno, 1999; Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
“Identity is the stable, consistent, and reliable sense of who one is and what one stands for in the world” (Josselson, 1987, p. 10; Walters & Auton-Cuff, 2009). Erikson
13
(1963), who is best known for his theory on the psychosocial development of human beings and often considered the founder of the identity theory, asserts that there are eight stages through which a person develops during his lifetime. Within each of these eight phases are psychological and social challenges to overcome. The eight stages that Erikson identified are: basic trust versus mistrust, autonomy versus shame and doubt, initiative versus guilt, industry versus inferiority, identity versus role confusion, intimacy versus isolation, generativity versus stagnation, and ego integrity versus despair. Each stage must be successfully completed and resolved for healthy development; otherwise, unresolved issues will resurface later on in life as problems (Werner & DeSimone, 2009).
The fifth stage in this developmental model, identity versus role confusion corresponds to the general period of puberty and adolescence in a person’s life. However, Erikson explains that, though the adolescence stage in life is crucial for the formation of identity and an overt identity crisis takes place during this time, the formation of identity begins in infancy and continues long after adolescence. It is a lifelong development process (Erikson, 1980; Josselson, 1987).
According to Erikson (1980), the feeling of having a personal identity includes two observations: one’s own perception of his “selfsameness” and “continuity in time”; and the fact that others recognize that sameness and continuity (p. 22). It happens when a person discovers a “persistent sameness within oneself” and also a “persistent sharing” of important characters with other people (Erikson, 1980, p. 109). This process of defining oneself is significant and does not happen in isolation. Personal identity is defined in relation to the world in which one inhabits; it happens within relationships to others.
Downie (1976) asserts that the mobility factor leaves the TCK without a sense of roots and without a web of stable relationships to help them develop their sense of identity (as cited in Fail et al., 2004).
The constant moving may hinder the formation of a complete sense of cultural and self-identity; the identity of a TCK is formed while juggling multiple cultures. Research show that often TCKs either feel like they belong to all the cultures they have come in contact with or none at all. “The TCK frequently builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership in any” (Pollock, 1989). This is the condition described as “marginality.”
Bennett (2004) says that the stage of “integration” in his (1993) Developmental Model of Intercultural Sensitivity (DMIS) can be used to describe people who make
14
frequent transitions between cultural contexts; TCKs certainly qualify. Bennett’s DMIS describes people’s progression from a state of ethnocentrism (where ones believes his own culture to be true and superior to all other cultures) to ethnorelativism (meaning that one believes that one’s culture is only one viable way of life among many other options) as they become more culturally competent (Bennett, 2004). The six stages of development in his model are 1) Denial, 2) Defense, 3) Minimization, 4) Acceptance, 5) Adaptation, and 6) Integration. As a person progresses from stage one through to stage six, he moves towards ethnorelativism.
Stage six, “integration of cultural difference is the state in which one’s experience of self is expanded to include the movement in and out of different cultural worldviews”
(Bennett, 2004, p.72). At this stage, no single culture is central to the individual’s view of life. Integration can have two manifestations of marginality, meaning that a TCK may effectively utilize his experiences and draw strengths from each culture and switch between these frames of culture with ease and experience constructive marginality. Or a TCK may outwardly still able to interact with other cultures, adjusting their behavior as the situation demands, but within, he may feel alienated from and rejected by all cultures, resulting in encapsulated marginality (Bennett, 2004; Fail et al., 2004; Selmer & Lam, 2004). The difference between the two states of marginality is whether or not the issue of identity has been resolved within (Bennett, 2004).
A look into the biracial identity development models can also be enlightening since the issues of multiple cultures are central to the experiences of both biracial individuals and TCKs. Poston’s (1990) model describes five stages in biracial identity development.
In the first stage, called personal identity, although they may have some awareness of race and ethnicity, individuals experience self separate from his race and ethnicity. In the second stage, called choice of group categorization, individuals choose an identity to take on. Their choices are affected by many factors such as the people in their lives, acceptance by different groups, their appearance, knowledge of language or culture, and personality. In the enmeshment/denial stage, individuals experience a sense of guilt, confusion, and torn allegiance for having to make a choice and deny part of themselves.
In the fourth stage, appreciation, individuals start to more fully understand and appreciate their multiracial background and may start to explore the race that they had previously denied. In the final stage of the model, integration, individuals experience acceptance and wholeness concerning their integrated multiracial identity.
15
Fail et al. (2004) summarizes the findings of different researchers such as Brislin (2000) and Munayer (2000) regarding the effect of mobility on TCKs and the formation of their identity. Brislin explains that culture provides guidelines for specific behaviors.
For TCKs, these specific behaviors change as they move from one place to another, often resulting in their cultural values and behaviors and therefore their sense of identity, being challenged when they arrive at a new culture. Munayer says that because TCKs so often find their old pattern of behavior or value from one culture inappropriate or unsuitable in the next culture; to adapt, they develop a chameleon-like quality, which go on to have a long-term effect on their identity formation (as cited in Fail et al., 2004; Pollock & Van Reken, 2009). They may never really gain a sense of who they are, and those around them may see them as a fence-sitter, never having a strong opinion or taking a stance on issues (Pollock & Van Reken, 2009).
A poignant passage written by travel writer Pico Iyer describes the predicament of TCKs who are adept at blending into new surroundings but have not fully grasped their own sense of identity:
The Global Soul may see so many sides of every question that he never settles on a firm conviction; he may grow so used to giving back a different self according to his environment that he loses sight of who he is when nobody's around. Even the most basic questions have to be answered by him alone, and when, on the planes where he may make his home, the cabin attendant passes down the aisle with disembarkation forms, it may be difficult for him
The Global Soul may see so many sides of every question that he never settles on a firm conviction; he may grow so used to giving back a different self according to his environment that he loses sight of who he is when nobody's around. Even the most basic questions have to be answered by him alone, and when, on the planes where he may make his home, the cabin attendant passes down the aisle with disembarkation forms, it may be difficult for him