Making Impressions & Confessing Feelings

At this stage of the confession, the confessors aim to make good impressions and confess loving feelings to the confessees. With such goals in mind, it is understandable that reward-based strategies and rationale-based strategies are the most frequently used categories for confessors in our data to build up their persuasion. Since this stage is normally a critical time for the confessors to actively persuade the confessees to become romantically involved, the confessors are still the more dominant topic initiators.

Nevertheless, confessees still play an important role at this stage for their responses and interactions with the confessors may determine the direction of the confession.

Confession 1: Turn 6 – 20

6 CONFESSOR; 我之前的:愛情宣言是:

想找到一個真實的女孩.

然後在妳剛才:

前面的環節中感覺,

…妳:符合我的:

..標準.

但是我總是感覺妳的心動男生肯定不是我,

當然:最不心動男生肯定也不是我, ((微笑))

因為已經知道答案了.

…我並不相信一見鍾情,

但是:當我轉過身來聽妳唱歌的時候,

..確實有一種心動的感覺.

My love declaration before was (that I) want to find a girl

my standard. But I kept feeling like your dream man is not me.

But of course your least dreamy man is not me either because we already knew the answer. I don’t believe in love at first sight.

But when I turn around and listen to you sing, (I) do get a that this is what you want to do then it’s okay.

9 CONFESSEE; ((點頭))

I have a way to make your height always surpass mine.

((WALK CLOSER TO THE FEMALE CONFESSEE)) ((HOLD THE FEMALE CONFESSEE UP)) ((SMILE))

15 CONFESSEE; ((大笑)) ((臉紅)) ((掩面))

((SMILE)) ((FACE TURN RED)) ((COVER FACE)) 16 CONFESSOR; ((把女嘉賓放下))

((PUT THE FEMALE CONFESSEE DOWN))

Maybe I’m not the best one. But in your life, I am willing to be my best self. usually consists of both emotionally and rationally appealing components. The confessor in this example also uses rationale-based strategies to present his rational arguments to convince the confessee to take his offer (Turn 6, 8 & 20).

As for the confessee, her responses and reactions have been polite, supportive, and positive throughout the process. She nods and smiles regularly to show that she is listening and even asks questions to prompt the confessor to continue saying or doing what he has in mind (Turn 14). Furthermore, instead of being shocked or offended by the confessor’s sudden move of holding her up, the confessee keeps laughing and even

and further persuades her to accept him, her general reaction is still quite positive (Turn 17 & 19). Her positive responses have indicated her interest in the male confessor’s proposal and have perhaps encouraged the confessor to be more confident in the confession. This may be the reason why the confessor would feel safe enough to use the less preferred strategy of direct request to ask the confessee to be in a relationship with him (Turn 20).

As a result, we can see that the second stage is also crucial for romantic confessees because it is a time for them to carefully evaluate the arguments presented by the confessors and leave hints of rejection or acceptance that allow an easier reveal of decision for both parties at the end of the confession. In our data, if a confessee was uninterested in establishing a relationship with the confessor, the confessee would tend to be less active in showing signs of cooperation or co-construction in the confession.

They would usually continue to limit themselves to minimal responses and nonverbal gestures to show that they are listening as in the previous stage, and they would generally not be willing to ask follow-up questions or reveal too much information

about themselves if not asked. On the other hand, if a confessee is interested in the confessor’s offer, they tend to take more initiative to co-construct the confession and

interact with the confessor. Sometimes, the confessee would even adopt reward-based strategies at this stage as a verbal reward to encourage the confessor to carry on with

his/her persuasion.

Depending on the level of progress made at this stage of the confession, there were times that a decision have already been made and the confessees would jump straight to the fourth stage to reveal the decision without moving to the third stage. For instance, if a confessee was certain that the confessor was not his/her type, after the confessor confessed his/her feelings and proposed to be in a relationship, the confessee would reveal his/her decision without even leaving room for further discussion or negotiation.

Alternatively, if a confessee was already tempted to agree to the confessor’s offer after his/her confession and proposal, the confessee might directly accept to be in a relationship with the confessor (See 6.5 for further discussions). Nonetheless, in many confessions, after the confessor has done confessing his/her feelings at this stage, the confession would then move on to the next stage in which the two parties continue to discuss the feasibility of becoming a couple.