Chapter 3: Two Ci
3.3 Ci Number One
In chapter 2, Sun Wukong’s teacher Subhuti 須菩提, as he wakes from his sleep while Sun Wukong awaits outside his room, is heard reciting the following ci:
「難！難！難！道最玄，莫把金丹作等閑。
不遇至人傳妙訣，空言口困舌頭乾！」
《西遊記》第二回頁五
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The verses of the ci describes how difficult it is to understand tao 道, to learn the mystery of immortality, and only to a perfect candidate is it worth the effort of revealing the secret. But since right after this ci is recited, Subhuti is impressed with both Sun Wukong’s inner brilliance and determination in seeking immortality and decides to unveil to Sun Wukong the secret of tao, the ci is imbedded with reverse psychology to arouse Sun Wukong’s curiosity and is recited in a sarcastic and enticing way. The possible problems a translator may encounter in translating this ci lie in the words and phrases of 道,金丹,等閒, and 至人.
Chart 10
Ci Number 1: Timothy Richard’s Translation
難！難！難！
道最玄，
莫把金丹作等閑。
不遇至人傳妙訣，
空言口困舌頭乾！
Hard it is, hard it is,
Mystery of mysteries to solve.
The Golden Pill give out to man with care.
The faithless can ne’er prize the gift divine.
Your breath is spent, you preach in vain.
(Richard, p.14)
The duplicate “hard it is” is hardly the best translation for the triplicate 難 when taken into consideration that the translation turns three words into two sentences.
The phrase “mystery of mysteries” indeed transfers the concept of the greatest mystery of all, unfortunately, the translation of “mystery of mysteries to solve” is difficult to understand and fails to explain any part of 道最玄 accurately. The word choices of “faithless” and “gift divine” in line 4 along with “preach” in line 5 seem to
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be pure reflections of Richard’s own religious beliefs again. All in all, Richard’s
translation of this ci is accessible with nice rhymes “care” and “vain,” but it falls short in conveying the key meanings of the source text.
Chart 11
Ci Number 1: Arthur Waley’s Translation
難！難！難！
道最玄，
莫把金丹作等閑。
不遇至人傳妙訣，
空言口困舌頭乾！
Hard, very hard!
The Way is most secret.
Never handle the Golden Elixir as though it were a mere toy!
He who to unworthy ears entrusts the dark truths To no purpose works his jaws and talks his tongue dry.
(Waley, p.23)
Though “Hard, very hard!” is a nice translation for 難!難!難!, it is common sense that “very” is not so much of a meaningful word. With a simple search on Google, one can easily find websites titled 45 ways to avoid using the word “very” or 128
words to use instead of “very” and so on. Nevertheless, Waley’s “Hard, very hard!” is
an improvement when compared to Richard’s double “Hard it is!” It is a pity that the source text 至人 is greatly reduced to “worthy ears” in English, only two small body parts of a whole person. In addition, the phrase “dark truths” in the fourth line is a strange translation for 妙訣 which is a highly sought-after secret of immortality while a dark truth may embody a negative meaning or ill intent.
Apart from a few minor issues, Waley’s translation of the ci is of good quality.
For example, his rendition of “The Way is most secret,” is such a great translation for
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道最玄 that it is used as a basic design for later versions. The metaphor of “a mere toy” and the phrase of “to no purpose” explain clearly the meanings of the
respective elements. It can be concluded that Waley, instead of opting for a word for word translation strategy, chose to adopt a free translation style for this ci and at the same time stay faithful to the meanings of the source text.
Chart 12
Ci Number 1: Anthony C. Yu’s Translation
難！難！難！
道最玄，
莫把金丹作等閑。
不遇至人傳妙訣，
空言口困舌頭乾！
Hard! Hard! Hard!
The Way is most obscure!
Deem not the gold elixir a common thing.
He who imparts dark mysteries not to a perfect man Is bound to make words empty, the mouth tired, and the tongue dry! (Yu, vol.1 p.87)
It must be pointed out that “Hard! Hard! Hard!” is an excellent translation for the triplicate 難!. It can be observed that Yu not only built upon Waley’s translation to come up with his own version, but also incorporated his own perspectives into the translation of the verses. In the second line, “The Way is the most obscure!” Waley’s
“secret” is replaced with Yu’s “obscure” which has an etymological meaning of “dark”
or “cover” and is a better translation for the word “玄” and is adopted by both Jenner and Kherdian in their later versions. Yu makes an effort in handling the minor details in the source text, for example, he uses the word “not” twice in the
translation to represent the negations of 莫 and 不 from the source text. The
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construction of “deem not” is reminiscent of John F. Kennedy’s 1961 inaugural address, but unfortunately the structure of “not to a perfect man” does not work as well. He also puts more work into the translation of the last line, ensuring that all the three elements in the source text are represented in his translation: “make words empty” for 空言, “the mouth tired” for 口困, and lastly “the tongue dry” for 舌頭乾, but even so, it is a pity that the last line is somewhat illogical.
Yu’s translation of the ci is not an upgrade from Waley’s, and a few parts can do with some revision, namely the phrases of “gold elixir,” “a common thing,” and “dark mysteries.” The combination of “gold” and “elixir” may be interpreted as an elixir made of gold which deviates from the original source text 金丹, there is certainly a more specific word for use than the word “thing,” and lastly, “dark mysteries” still carries a similarly negative connotation and is not much of an improvement from Waley’s version of “dark truths.”
Chart 13
Ci Number 1: W.J.F. Jenner’s Translation
難！難！難！道最玄，
莫把金丹作等閑。
不遇至人傳妙訣，
空言口困舌頭乾！
It’s hard, hard, hard. The Way is very obscure, Don’t make light of the Gold and the Cinnabar.
To teach miraculous spells to any but the Perfect Man, Is to tire the voice and dry the tongue in vain.
(Jenner, vol.1 p.47)
The phrase jindan 金丹 is not only a cultural specific term but it is also closely associated with Taoism and Chinese alchemy, and it generally refers to the target of
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reaching immortality through enlightenment and arduous training or the intake of unique substances obtained in nature. It is explained in Xiyouji chapter 5 as Sun Wukong, being drunk from consuming all the wine at the peach banquet, wanders into Taishang Laojun’s 太上老君 Doulu Palace and discovers all the precious jindan that Laojun has taken pains to concoct and has stored in guard bottles:
這大聖直至丹房裏面，尋訪不遇。但見丹灶之傍，爐中有火。爐左右 安放著五個葫蘆，葫蘆裏都是煉就的金丹。大聖喜道：「此物乃仙家之 至寶。老孫自了道以來，識破了內外相同之理，也要煉些金丹濟人，
不期到家無暇。今日有緣，卻又撞著此物。趁老子不在，等我吃他幾 丸嘗新。」他就把那葫蘆都傾出來，就都吃了，如吃炒豆相似。
The passage reveals the concepts that jindan is named the most prized treasure in heaven and the appearance and taste resemble those of fried beans. We also learn from the later chapters that Sun Wukong’s body becomes indestructible after
ingesting all five bottles of Laojun’s jindan. All the other translators referred to jindan as an elixir of a golden color, which is a domestication strategy that makes the
concept more easily comprehensible to English readers, making it a nice translation.
However, Jenner’s rendition of “the Gold and the Cinnabar” appears to be a different approach and treats the phrase of jindan as two separate items with proper nouns.
In ancient Chinese alchemy, gold and cinnabar were the most sought-after
substances to manipulate and ingest. It was believed that through the refinement and ingestion of gold and cinnabar, which had a spiritual value, life could be
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elongated. The reality was ironic though, as cinnabar contained high levels of mercury, those who ingested it were actually committing slow suicide.
Jenner’s translation of the ci is mostly on target: “make light of” for 等閒, “the Gold and the Cinnabar” for 金丹, “miraculous spells” for 妙訣, and the final “in vain”
adds a nice finishing touch to the last line. R.E.H. compliments Jenner in his article
Havoc in Heaven: Adventures of the Monkey King by W. J. F. Jenner that a more
scholarly approach would inevitably help Jenner to improve his version, but still his translation is rarely grossly inaccurate and does in fact approach standard for
smoothness and lightness established by Arthur Waley in his Monkey (R.E.H., p.197).
Jenner’s translation of this ci exhibits his ability in scholarly approach and the
smoothness and lightness of his translation is comparable to those of Arthur Waley’s.
Chart 14
Ci Number 1: David Kherdian’s Adaptation
難！難！難！
The Way is most obscure.
The Golden Elixir must be secret and sacred.
To teach the dark mysteries to the imperfect man Is to confront the jaw, confuse the tongue, And tire the brain.
(Kherdian, p.17)
On the whole, as an adaptation and the latest published version of Xiyouji, Kherdian has the advantage of using previous translations as references. Kherdian’s adaptation of this ci is somewhat successful in blending some of the strengths of the
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previous translations and, as a poet himself, incorporating new elements into it. For example, the expansion on “secret and sacred” adds a fun twist of alliteration to Waley’s version of “secret.” The combination of “the imperfect man” does not work well in the ci as it is too specific, perhaps “an imperfect man” is a better substitute.
Kherdian shows his creativity in the last line by using “confront the jaw,” “confuse the tongue,” and “tire the brain,” even though the jaw and the brain are absent from the source text. This shows that as Kherdian rewrites the story based on previous
translations, he does not refer to and is not affected by the source text, hence, his style becomes too free.